How Your Sexual History Relates to the Kelly Blue Book

As I’ve said before, there are so many facets to my being that sometimes men simply choose to believe aren’t true or too good to be true. Yeah, I’ve heard this one before and don't buy the "too good to be true" because I'm standing right here. LOL. But it’s taken me some time to realize what was going on but I’ve finally come to figure some things out about the male species. Last week, we were talking about how men respect women who respect themselves and I guess this is kind of a follow-up. I think that black men today have lowered their standard for black women so much, that when they encounter a real women who upholds a standard they can't believe it! I’ve had the opportunity to talk to some real black men in my lifetime and have figured out that a lot of men see a woman’s sexual history as a Kelly Blue Book value.

You know, I don’t know if it’s something innate or sociological but I’m leaning more towards innate. I’m speaking of the fact that men tend to become very protective of the women they care about, especially after they’ve had sexual intercourse with that woman. They tend to see the woman as their prized possession, which the bible does speak of a wife’s body belonging to her husband and vice versa. I remember the movie The Best Man with Morris Chestnut as Lance and Monica Calhoun playing his fiancé named Mia. Lance was just bumpin’ and grindin’ with all these groupie "women", while on the other hand Monica was so faithful and had him as her only sexual partner. Now, I’m not advocating fornication but simply pointing out how Lance became sooooo angry when she had sex with someone else after he’d been with all these women. Granted, it was his best friend so I think that was just awful and very childish of her but because he loved her, he still wanted to protect her. How could he do this when she’s giving the most precious, sacred part of herself away like it was candy? In the same sense, he was wrong but he still was protective of her in all of his shenanigans.

Now, let’s say that you have twins named Jessica and Quiana and both have everything comparable; caring, smart, funny, beautiful eyes, smile, hair, body shape, community volunteerism, college educated, upwardly mobile, etc. Okay, there’s one thing that isn’t comparable though. Quiana Car Fax history shows that 15 men have owned her car before while Jessica Car Fax history says 2? It’s a lot of competition out here so with 7 black men to 1 black woman and with men being who they are anyway; who do you think they are going to choose? I believe it just goes back to human nature; everyone wants something as new and shiny as possible and no one wants to get a used gift. And with the epidemic of HIV going around in my race and the fact that black women are 40% of new HIV cases, it’s more “safe” to choose the Jessica anyway.

In the past, I’ve had much older men say things to me like, “Oh, your so fresh and refined,” and that “a lot of my women my age are damaged.” Gee, I wonder how they became damaged? From men like you who’ve messed over them and then when they are in their late 30s and early 40s, you don’t want them anymore. So, I’m in my early twenties and you are wayyyy older than me and have been bumping and grinding for more years than I’ve been out of High School and NOW, you want someone fresh and refined that’s not damaged? I've learned that certain men are just not going to believe the truth because it makes it easier for them to try and use you; and I'm not into arguing..."just leave em' alone." You ladies already know how I describe our bodies as being the bolt and it’s imperative that along with keeping the outside together that our Kelly Blue Book value and Car Fax report makes the next man you become romantically involved with say, “Danggggg, it’s like that?” or in other words make him say, “wow” because that’s what real kings want…someone rare and beautiful. And if he doesn't belive you, then obviously he's not a real king or "the one" for you!