He's In Love With A Stripper-The Real Strippers of Detroit Part I

I’ll say it again, “men respect women who respect themselves.” Now, you remember the old cliché, “if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck.” Some women hate to hear this but if you are dressed like a prostitute or stripper, then that’s how people are going to treat you. Some may say, “my clothes don’t define me,” and they may not but clothes do relay information about you. There’s an old rap song called, “I’m in love with a stripper,” more like lust but did you catch the song title? This rapper who produced the song, T-pain said, “I’m in love with a stripper,” as if this occupation defines her whole person. Think about it ladies; all he sees this woman as is a stripper and that is all he loves about her. What about her intelligence, her caring personality, her funny quirks? Obviously, when you are in love with someone you see all of who they are and not just their occupation but this is the only aspect of her he is interested in; her stripping. I doubt that T-pain says about his wife; I’m in love with a real estate investor or a baker and the reason he doesn’t is because he loves everything she represents, not just one part. You don't here people walking around saying, "I'm in love with a lawyer or Executive Assistant," but 9/10 they use the person's name and say, "Yeah, I'm in love with Sherry." This man can't even address this woman by her name cause' he doesn't see her in that aspect and wants to mentally seperate her from who she actually is because just maybe he will see that she is an actual person with a soul. Anyhow, I want to talk about what actually goes on in the physical environment and the spiritual aspects.

Wow…this is a heavy topic that God has given me revelation on but I’ll try to break it down as easily as possible. Well, here’s something you guys don’t know; my cousin is a stripper! Yes, she is a stripper and she does not want to be a stripper. Some of the things I tell you may be too disturbing but I am warning you in advance, it’s not a pretty occupation. Before my cousin could even take off her clothes in front of people she didn’t know, she had to drink a lot of alcohol in order to get a buzz or kind of drunk. Of course you don’t have to wonder why. But she’s revealed some things that really take place and basically, men don’t respect women who strip.Let’s look at the spiritual aspect of what happens in a strip club which many men have no idea. Now, in a strip club there are many spirits of lust, adultery, perversion, etc. I know it scares many Christians when people talk about this but God’s people perish for their lack of knowledge; God wants you to know these things. There are wicked spirits who have certain tasks within the enemy’s kingdom just as God has Archangels, cherubs, etc; remember that Satan copies what God does in the opposite. Read 2 Chronicles 18:18-22 and you will see that God uses even evil spirits to bring forth his purpose and that certain spirits have certain tasks. Is there any question that in an environment where men lust after women, commit adultery physically and in their heart and other perversions that these type of evil spirits will lurk about? What makes it worst is that these men go back home and bring these spirits into their home, with their wife, children, etc so essentially they aren’t only destroying their lives but innocent loved ones are being effected.

Okay, so you think that stripping is the only thing that goes on? Think about it this way; an evil spirit isn’t going to stop inducing men to just look and lust after the stripper, or perhaps touch the stripper but is going to make them try and go as far as the human beings involved will permit. Now, this is what my cousin says; the men which she has stripped for have fondled her and even done things to her vaginal cavity with their hands. This to me is very, very sad and sickening because she does not know these men and even if she did it would be wrong. Secondly, think about how many different men she may dance for in one week; how many men are doing this to her? How many different men are groping her and abusing her body? And then, to think that these men with their unclean hands and fingers have the audacity to go further and mess with her vaginal cavity? All so she can make $25 for a lap dance.

It may be a little heavy for some of you, so I'm splitting this up in different parts.

He Says, "I Just Wanted To See How You Were Doing..."

Yep, that’s always how “it” starts…with a simple greeting. I’m talking about the “case of the ex” or anyone that God has taken out of your life for a reason or maybe a season. One of the things I’ve learned is that a man in your life should be there to uplift you and encourage you to grow closer to God; if he isn’t doing that then there’s your answer to get away from him. In one of my first blog postings, I said to take the man’s number instead and pray about it because you can find yourself in messed up situations from giving your number first. I also said that bringing up “God” in a conversation may be able to help you discern where he is spiritually because out of the heart flows the issues of life and that’s what I’ll be talking about today.

Sometimes, we as women make some issues more complicated than they are but as I began to grow closer to God, The Holy Spirit gives me revelations on how to handle certain situations. If you really want to know how or who a person truly is, listen to what they are saying. “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45
As women, we tend to become so used to talking to our girlfriends all the time, that we forget that men don’t communicate in the same way we do. Men tend to communicate (especially when getting to know you) moreso to receive information rather than just for the sake of just talking about any and everything. The Holy Spirit just had to remind me recently to take time and be quiet. Listen to what the man is saying because it will tell you more about him, what is in his heart and remember, “he is not your girlfriend.” If you know what this man has said in the past is wrong, then don't entertain him.

Ladies, you have to guard your heart and that means not communicating with men who are going to bring you down. Yes, you can pray for them but associating with them is not going to help you get to where you need to go. Remember this: Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23 or Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. Now, what do you think happens when the springs of life flow from your heart and you entertain the idea of letting a sinful man creep back into your life? Because as I write this, it’s not just for you but it’s for me too and we all know that sin kills or the wages of sin are death…unrepented sin not under the blood of Jesus Christ. What I am saying is that you are entertaining accepting death into your heart. All it takes is one conversation, one phone call, one “let's have dinner” for you to be back in a situation that God has already taken you from.

See, the enemy likes to make things easy for you because broad is they way of destruction. But truly living for God is not easy but we have God’s spirit sustaining us. Ladies, we need to check ourselves from thinking “Oh, I just need a man to talk to and be with right now,” knowing that this man in his early 20s, doesn’t believe in following God’s word like you do and not even thinking about the slightest possibility of being married. So, what do you really think is going to happen after a couple of months of establishing a “bond” with this man and I’m not just talking about sex. Your relationship with God is going to be severely effected because his heart is somewhere else, in a place that doesn’t want to encourage you to grow. A person that is truly sent by God will always want to help you be better and grow closer to God, while they are doing the same. I am telling you personally that evil communications corrupt good manners but you don’t have to let it happen because you won’t be close enough to hear whatever this man is telling you. When you get that phone call, letter in the mail or email, don’t respond. Just remember that God is faithful and sees your faithfulness too and will give you a man better than you could’ve dreamed who will cover you as your husband.

“Ladies, watch out for those seductive love songs!”

I don’t think I would do any of you single Christian women out there in cyberspace any justice if I didn’t bring up the topic of “love” songs. So, I’m a sucker for the old school R’B love songs; the ones that talk about real love not all this crap made now-a-days. Well, not everything is crap because just this recently, I was in the car with my best friend listening to the radio and a song by Musiq Soulchild came on. Some of you may not be R’B fans but the song is called, “So Beautiful” and I’ll post the lyrics later on. The tone of the song was extremely too seductive for ME during that time but you have to judge for yourself when certain songs are making your flesh weak.

Even though we are Christian women, we are still women and that means we are made of flesh. Being that we are made of flesh, we have desires for the opposite sex and that’s the way God has made us. Since we know this, then we must be aware that as women there are certain things that can arouse you or dwell in your mind without you even knowing it. If you are sitting in the car and a specific song comes on, take into account how you feel when listening to the song and also if you feel a “Holy Spirit Check-up” happening. He knows what you can handle and what you can’t, which is why we need to be aware to what he is saying. Sometimes, I just turn off the radio to see what he is saying or affirming in my spirit about a certain thing and in this instance, a song.

In “So Beautiful” we have lyrics that every woman would love to hear from her man-ahem-her husband. What woman doesn’t want to hear she’s beautiful and that she pleases him in and out of the bedroom? You’re sitting up listening to this song but inside, you’re thinking, “Wow…that sounds really nice,” and before you know it, you are in extreme longing for the opposite sex. Again, it’s nothing wrong to desire the opposite sex but you don’t want to let your flesh get out of control

Oh-my-gosh ladies! I know it isn’t easy but I just believe that if you carefully guard your heart, it will be worth it in the end. God is going to honor your faith, submission, obedience and sacrifice meaning that when you are married, you will have husband to say all of those wonderful things and more. Just continue to watch those seductive songs and take into consideration what The Holy Spirit is saying.

My Perspective On The African-American Family

You may be new to my blog but one thing you will find out about me is that I am not the typical 21st century woman. I don't know if I could classify myself because there are so many facets to me but I guess it would be said that I am more traditional and also I am an African-American young woman, Christian, no kids, never married. Well, I try to look at things from an aspect that God would have me to because...well, He's God. A duh! So, I'm taking a break from my guest blog posts and sharing some edifying perspectives that many women don't know or tend to overlook when dealing with marriage.

Now, let's take my perspective as an African-American woman and what I observe in many African-American women. Once while at a movie theatre, an African-American family with the husband and wife in the mid to late 30s were out with their young daughter/son about 10 or so. There was a long line and the husband was basically being a man and questioning management why the line was so long. Unfortunately, the wife wouldn't let him maintain his God-given authority as head of the household and kept nudging him to be quiet. Now, how crazy does it look to have a woman try to shut up a full grown man when he is basically doing what God made him to do?

Here's a refresher and yeah, I borrowed it:

1. WIVES SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBAND - EPHESIANS 5:22-24
Ever since Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden the battle of the sexes have been raging on! But here God makes things very simple, wives are to submit to their husbands as unto the Lord. Not slaves, not bossed around like some lower life form, not trampled on like garbage, but to respect, honor, submit to the husband as he is the leader of the family. Now some may not like that, but don’t get mad at me, God said it!

Now, in the African-American family (like many households today) many of the gender roles aren't where they should be and this is a result of many factors: slavery, western culture ideals such as feminism, blah, blah, blah. It is perfectly okay for wives to speak their mind but there is also a time to simply be led. A husband is a covering and that is the way God ordained it. When you try to step out of your role that God has made for you, it simply won't work...which is why alot of the world is in chaos now and the divorce rate is around 40%. I don't know about you but I like the fact that I don't have to always be in charge all the time; it's a huge job which is one of the reasons alot of ungodly marriages don't work is because Christ is not leading the husband in the huge role he has.

There are going to be times in your marriage where your husband is going to say, "No, we aren't going to ...XYor Z." It may be something you really want to do but he is firmly saying, "No." Are you going to submitt or simply believe that Christ is leading him to make this decision. As a man of God, his connection and prayer life with God is a huge factor in sustaining your marriage because there will be many times where disagreements may arise but you will have to submitt. Only a mature woman can handle this aspect of marriage and don't get me wrong, your husband is going to be some type of slaveholder saying 'no' everytime you turn around. A true man of God is going to have the right type of balance between being tender and firm when necessary.

The Air We Breathe-Part 2 of Previous Blog Post

Wow, it's so easy for me to be consistent when I'm only posting guest blog posts. I know I'm very analytical at times which is why I find this whole analysis so interesting because it just seems to "fit" and make perfect sense; it's like a "light bulb" moment. With no further delay, here's Part 2. And as always, I'm posting tags to make it a bit easier for you to navigate through the blog postings.

The Air We Breathe

God made Eve from Adam's rib; the part of his body that supports and protects his heart and lungs. The analogy is that the woman is the "heart and lungs", while the man is the "ribcage" which protects her.

Scripture says that the life of the flesh is in the blood (Leviticus 17:11). So when we discuss the functions of the heart and lungs, we are specifically addressing those organs needed to sustain and promote life in the body. This is a parallel to who woman is and what she does.

Is a woman's role only relevant to a husband and wife relationship? No! It has nothing to do with being married or having children. We are speaking of how God has designed women with the primary purpose of her carrying and supporting life - in all areas. Woman is a life-giver whether dealing with the family of her parents, the family of her husband, or the family of God. This is simply who she is and it can be expressed via the role of a wife, a mother, and/or a handmaiden to the Lord.

Let's look at this more closely.

The Heart of the Home
A Breath of Fresh Air
A Place of Refreshing
An Inner Strength and Might
Symbiotic Alignment
Industrious Nature
Delicate and Pliable

The Heart of the Home

There is a saying that the woman is the "heart of the home."

Notice that she is the heart of the "home", not the heart of a house. In other words, a woman makes a house a home by what she brings to it. She is the life force in the home, both spiritually and physically.

"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1"She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens." Proverbs 31:15

The Hebrew word for Eve is Chavvah which means "life". The woman is the one who propagates and regenerates life; she physically nurtures and gives birth to life, but she is also a spiritual life-giver.

The same attributes a woman physically provides to a baby in the the womb is what the woman brings spiritually to other environments: nourishment, sustenance, nurturing, insulation, warmth, comfort, a place conducive for growth, etc.

Whether one is ever a mother physically or not, like Deborah, a woman can serve as a spiritual mother to God's people.

Input from Guest Blog: The Beauty of Submission

It's just amazing how God leads me to topics I've been speaking about as He continually tells me more and more about life. A few weeks ago, I spoke on submission and how women tend to see it from a wordly perspective when the concept arises but now, I have a blog post that goes more indepthy into the concept along with marriage itself. I've noticed that today, in the 21st century it is difficult for some men to accept a woman looking to them as the husband to be a leading stable figure in the household and don't know how to accept a woman that submits. Of course, I truly believe that's one of many reasons many relationships don't last because there is always a power struggle and things aren't on a level playing field from the beginning. So, no more delay cause' if you've been searching for this topic on google or some other search engine, I hope my tags helped you a bit.

The Beauty of Submission

In the previous articles, we searched the Scriptures to establish that the authority of God is patriarchal. We also examined the story of the judge, Deborah, as the epitome of a woman in service to the Lord: one who was wise, prudent, proclaimed God's word and supported the patriarchy of God.

What then is the purpose for which woman was created and why is it so critical that she submit to man? One could simply say, "God commanded woman to submit to the man, and that's enough." While that is accurate, God doesn't do things arbitrarily. There is a reason for everything He does...even when we cannot understand it (Isaiah 55:9, Romans 11:34).

"And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him." Genesis 2:18

We stated earlier how the woman must submit to man as a result of Eve's sin in the Garden of Eden. However, notice that her purpose in providing companionship for, and being a help to, man was part of God's original plan. From the beginning, woman was created for man (not man for woman).

The question then becomes, "How is the woman to help the man?" In answering that we find understanding for the role she is to serve and why submission is necessary.

The Heart of the Matter

"And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." Genesis 2:21-23

When God was creating woman, He took one of Adam's ribs in order to form her. This small point is not insignificant. Again, God does everything for a reason.

The ribs provide one main function: protection for the heart and the lungs. Both the heart and lungs are critical to the life of the body, yet the nature of their work requires that these organs be soft, delicate, and pliable (and thereby in need of protection).

The heart keeps blood flowing, ensuring that life reaches other parts of the body. It also provides a place of refreshing where the blood can get re-oxygenated or revived in order to continue its work. As such, the heart needs to be sensitive and flexible enough to the respond to the body's electrical impulses regarding contraction in order to keep the blood pumping. It is strong and is one of the largest muscles in the human body. It is an involuntary muscle meaning we do not have to consciously tell the heart to beat. It is created to anticipate the needs of the body and does so automatically.

The lungs are the place where gas exchange occurs within the human body; it collects the oxygen needed to give energy to the blood and expels toxins such as carbon dioxide. Similar to the heart, the lungs must be elastic enough to inflate/deflate as needed to support the inhaling and exhaling of air. Again, the lungs are involuntary muscles and expand/contract without willful thought by nature of their design.

The heart and lungs work around the clock, processing on average 8,000 - 9,000 liters of blood and air respectively a day. When they don't work properly, it impacts the whole body's ability to function as it should.

Understanding the functional purpose that these delicate organs serve and how vital their work is to the health of the body, it is clear to see why God - in His infinite wisdom - encased the heart and lungs under the protection of the ribs.

Part 2 of the post tommorrow.

God Didn't Want That to Happen To You!

All over the United States, there are black women (and men) suffering in silence because of what happened to them while they were children. Well, I want to let you know that God loves you and it was not in His will for anyone to ever physically or sexually abuse, molest or attempt to tamper with your innocence. Okay, I have a friend that would be a bit ashamed for to tell you all this herself but while she was growing up men had attempted to molest her.

When you are growing up and someone trys to molest, rape or abuse you in some way it can really effect who you become as an adult. You might think it doesn't effect you but in all likelihood, it does. So, I asked her, "Do you think you have issues with men because of what happened to you?" I'm paraphrasing but she said that basically, she doesn't trust many men even when it seems that they are legit. Of course, all women should be cautious when it comes to men but if The Holy Spirit has revealed to you the true character of a man, don't be a victim again when God has already told you that the man won't hurt you. For my friend, it's just an issue that God is helping her to deal with and each day she is growing to trust again. It's something like an in and out coming tide: at one moment she may feel hersef growing an attachment to a man but at the next instance, she's struck with the past and how virtually every man she ever met only wanted to use her. And it makes it no better that each time she's tried to step out and form something serious, men have tried to use her again and again.

Now, the main culprit who harrased my friend did so over a period of ages 11-14 but for some of you it may have happened at younger ages. Either way, God didn't want that to happen to you. The person that tried to harm you was not in God's will and was being used by the enemy to keep you from being all God intended. But I'm telling you; it doesn't have to be that way. God can release any shame or guilt you may feel. It was not your fault, please remember that. I know that like most victims, you are probably wondering "Why me?" I'm not exactly sure but I do know a savior that says you can cast your cares on Him.

God wants you to be happy, to live an abundant life not having to think about something someone did to you 10 years ago. Yes, it hurts badly but all your hurts and pains God can take them away. And eventually, you will be brought to a point where you can forgive this person for what they did. So, here is a sample prayer that you can follow:

"Dear Lord, I come to you humbly saying thank you for all you are doing in my life. Thank you for continually being with me Lord, even when no one else is there and I feel all alone. God, you know what *insert names of predator/s* tried to do to me. God, it may have happened long ago but I find myself still being affected by it and I know you want me to be healed. I don't want to cry anymore or wonder why or let this issue come up anymore in my life. I know that one day you will bring me a wonderful King and I don't want to miss out on him because of this issue of my past. So please God, take away my fears, my tears and my pain and heal my emotional wounds by the stripes of Jesus Christ. I believe it's possible and everytime you see me getting emotional over what *insert name of predator* has done, let your love wash over me and comfort me by your Holy Spirit. And even though it hurts, I forgive *insert predator* and ask that you bring them to a point where they are given a new spirt, heart and that you renew their mind. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray, Amen."